Words of a Stranger

Waxing lyrical of the crappy details of my life and my views with a healthy dose of cynicism, sarcasm and everything you like about non-wholesome movies.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Humans are animals. We're just more complicated and by nature defy nature.

Why do I always attract creepy guys????


My workplace has this floor-cleaning uncle who, I realised recently, was stalking me in accordance to my conspiracy theories.


What did I do? All I ever did was to be nice and say hello sincerely. It's part of my workplace work ethics, too.


And suddenly he's all, "Ha-lo~~ shiao jeh(xiao jie)~~" in this absolutely irkful manner everytime I come in for work.


At first I just thought: Okay, leave it alone, be nice when he greets you... It's only one of your many conspiracy theories, and you can always keep walking and hide in the workplace if it's really uncomfortable...


Then one fine sunday, after work, I come to the 7-11 above (as usual) to get a snack while waiting for my mom, and to my horror, HE'S in there, exactly where he's never been in before in all those same times of the day I always see him, and where he has no need to be in (since 7-11 is cleaned by it's own employees).


The moment I come in, he greets me again in that same, affected manner and same, disgusting expression, and follows me to the counter where I buy my stuff, watching me all the time. I didn't see HIM buy anything.



And people wonder why our first world city has such uncivilised society. Why should we be civilised to each other when everytime we do, the other sees that as a sign that he can get something from you? It's a cycle; since nobody will respond in a civilised manner, nobody tries to be courteous and civilised in the first place.


Speaking from the point of view of a very, very harassed girl who wonders why she seems to attract more flies than honeybees. Actually, I'm not even sure why I attract so many... insects, usually within first meeting/interaction, too. How come the girls who are obviously more gorgeous/shapely/feminine than me, don't seem to be as harassed?


If I'm going to be harassed, at least give me a reason to be harassed. Make me beautiful. Zitless at the very least.



All those guys out there that fear me... listen up!! If you want to blame somebody for my scaring you, blame those guys...


... Lechers.


They are the reason I like to scare guys. So that hopefully the creepy ones STAY AWAY FROM ME.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Looks can affect mood.

Very happy with the way I put my clothes together today. Nice low cut beige-ish top with long purple bohemian skirt. And partial ponytail. Looked good even with glasses.


And some certain guys noticed too. Herein lies my true intentions. So now you know. Muhahhahahahahha.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Live for the moment, every moment.

By a certain adjacent request, I am now to blog some scandalous gossip. Of me.


Hey, I can't very well openly display gossip of other people on my blog right? If I do, I have to be subtle about it. Defamation laws.



I shall now tell all of you the story of the bear that a guy attempted, and failed, to get for me. And for the sake of those who have already heard the story, I shall add a few details that, though minor, I believe will spice up the tale a wee bit...


Let's see now... all of you remember the mention of my match, no? Right then. I have a confession. We haven't just been playing the 'flirt' game for show. We have been flirting, with and without an audience. And I admit, I'm rather taken in.


On the day of Convocation, our orientation group met up early for breakfast together. My match and I were the earliest there, as it happens. But sorry, no hanky panky here. Extra information for those interested: I was wearing contacts, a normal black skirt, court shoes, a v-cut plain white blouse and I had my hair up in a bun with a bit of fringe framing the right side of my face. Somehow the bun made me look very nice... not quite sure why, but it works...

Anyway, he had some letters he needed to post, but he (nor I, nor my other victim, who arrived third) didn't know where one could find a postbox. So he decided to line up at the control station at the gates to get information. While he was doing that, I stood on the spot and looked around to get any visual clues to the direction of the postbox. Of course, me being me, I did so in my usual 'sweet' style, with one fingernail suggestively in between my teeth, reason being that I figured my dear match was watching me (and I was right. He wasn't being too shy about it either, though it did not amount to staring... he seemed to be rather enjoying himself...).

At the mrt station, there were some girls collecting donations for charity, and people who donated three dollars could get a little bear (by this time, quite a lot of the group had arrived). My match, sweet dah-ling, tried to get me a bear, but he only had ten dollar notes, and the poor girls couldn't exactly rip open the donation cans to get him a change. While they were hesitating, I took out four bucks and took the bear. I think my match was quite disappointed... hee... so adorable.

Later, as we entered the hall, we saw our buddy group's facilitator, who blinked at me for a few seconds before going, "Ei, hi~ listen, I gotta go, I'll catch up with you guys later..." (I know I'm making random guesses at certain things I've been hinting... but do you want a good story or not?) I think that bun really worked for me...

During the second half of convocation (the let's-party-now-the-parents-are-outside bit), there was a little in-house disco going on, but in our area, the only ones really dancing were my match and I, so we got pushed out to do disco on the red carpet. So we just disco-ed together in the middle of nowhere and got a few whoops on the way...

After convocation, he tried to share tea with me too... hahaha... and we were exchanging looks throughout, when we weren't trying to catch each other's eye (yes, yes, I know you know I'm exaggerating... but don't pretend you're not enjoying this).

My match left earlier than me. When I was going out later on, I... er... stopped by my buddy group's facilitator just to say hi and leave (half expecting him to try striking a conversation), but instead of letting me leave so fast, he asked for my name again, promised to remember it this time, and then said his goodbye. And of course I did my thing while that short exchange was going on.


I'm so evil... Muhahahahahahhaa...


So that's the extended bear story... and as promised, I will update any scandals (only of me, mind) up here for all of you admire or defame... or more importantly, to give you a topic to gossip on.


Until next time!

Friday, August 18, 2006

好玩儿归好玩、正经归正经……但谁说不能拥有两者?

试一试,这行得通吗?

行耶!

今日又可以写中文了,真是福气、福气啊!!


当然,平常来欣赏的读者就会有些奥恼。无所谓……多听,多看、多学嘛!(别往我身上丢嗅鸡蛋)



刚刚陪家人去看《疯狂的石头》,真的意外……没想到我父母竟在去看华戏……


不过话说回来,真是笑死人了!!……天,刚才笑得差点儿喘不过气来。BMW,竟能反译成「别摸我」……天啊……


我好喜欢我这台新的电脑……你们看得出吗?哇哈哈哈哈哈哈~~……

Sunday, August 13, 2006

No pain, no gain... Hey, some things are worth it. We hope.

Alrighty, hi people. I'm really sorry about the terrible Cambodia post, but I was really feeling awful and didn't feel like staying too long...


But now I'm feeling better!!! And I shall tell you AAAAAALLLLLLLL about my devious little adventures in my uni freshmen camp.




Not that you really want to know. But this is my blog. And if you come here, either you're someone trying to figure out what I've been doing lately, in which case I shall reveal that to you with glee; or you came to be disturbed, in which case I shall do my duty with glee.




For starters, before the freshmen camp, there was orientation dinner, where I immediately found myself two victims and--- unwittingly-- found my match in one of them. I'll explain later. And you've guessed it: they were two guys.


Before I continue, maybe I should explain that there are five sections in the camp, and each section in split into six groups. I was in the Greeks section, group Aristotle.

Yeah, yeah... stop choking.


Anyways, on the first morning, after we all met up at the school campus, my group had this 'get m&ms for information' thingy, following which we played catch the tail with the other groups, only instead of grabbing hankies we were upsurping members of the other team. Our head... power lah... we actually managed to completely engulf one other group into our long line. I've never seen that happen before. That group had about 4 people left in their line, so our head quietly went up, and starting from the tail, tapped each one and waved them to the back of our line noiselessly, until the other team's head was left wondering what happened. He became our brand new tail.


After we got to camp, I realised yet again how assumptions can be dangerous. I had assumed the guys and the girls were going to be bunked separately. Nope. One big happy family, people. Because of the lack of space, my match and I were making jokes about sleeping together, which in fact we almost ended up doing (if you're thinking dirty, get it out of your head. Now.), if not for the fact that some people were forced to sleep below the blocks, in the open.


We went on to lose the witch doctor's challenge, consisting of a trick game by the facilitators, a toe tower competition, a three-way tug of war, and a wash-the-ball-out-of-the-barrel-drilled-with-holes thingy, where I sincerely applaud the boys for showing great valour.


Oh, I drew our flag, but our flag got lost in the wind. It just vapourised.


Next up was kayaking, and the first time I got flipped in my kayak due to a task we had to do. Fun though. We had to do this jump-frog thingy on kayaks (the game, not the physical one, even though it was pretty physical in this case... am I confusing you?), where I got really stressed because I was the only one looking out for the waves. I never heard the end of it.


Later that night we were transported to Changi area for a 'night walk' ie haunted house routine.


On the bus, my match offered to sit with me, and who would give up an offer from a bait? But here's where I lost my battle, thanks to a new poem I was working on. I actually got cornered into asking my other teammate to switch seats again (this was denied me). I CAN'T BELIEVE I LOST!!!! But the battles continue...


Wah lau, I never realised haunted bungalows could be SO FUNNY. In one of the segments, only the girls were permitted to go into the bungalow marked "Despaired Ho sewives" (the 'u' dropped off) to collect four corks from four different bowls. This had to be done in pairs, but we girls eventually congregated anyway. There was this room where a pirate was resting and a guy in tshirt and jeans popped out off the closet, and the pirate demanded answers to three of his questions per pair before he'd say, 'You may pass'. Very stupid 3 questions, each and everytime. Case in point: What is your name? What is your purpose? What is your favourite colour? (there was this one: what is square root of 81 times 2?)

When the pair of girls in front of my pair were in the room, I decided to be me and asked the pirate, "Why does your soul rest here?"
"Do you really want to know?"
"Yes."
"A long time ago, I murdered my wives. Their spirits roam in this place."
"(point to guy in jeans behind the pirate) Does one of them look like that?"
"Does SHE look like a 'SHE'????? (laughter from all the girls) ... Trust me to have better taste than that."

After my 3 questions (I originally lied about my name, but the girls' sniggers gave me away), my partner and I went in and passed the guy in jeans, who was sitting on a chair and mumbling very unwillingly, 'Do I look like a 'she'?', to which I could only reply, 'Sorry~~'


But I also had to drink a mouthful of everybody's saliva. Urgh.


I didn't get any sleep that night. The bunk was really crowded and uncomfortable.


Next day, I was most impressed with my group. We completed most of the land tasks without much trouble, including the famous Giant's Finger (the one where you have to lift the tire out of the pole, only this time our pole was bent; we could not touch the pole nor could we talk during the task. we were very efficient here for some reason).


Later I got picked out to go do the campfire skit for the section... It went through a lot of changes, but eventually we got it done. I was the host of the Immortal Idol, which we performed later that night and won top honours for. Credits given to the poor guy who kena molested by me for the skit. HON-HON!!!


We originally had some people who composed the section cheer, but everyone complained about it, so some of us were asked to come up with something better. I wrote it, submitted, and in so doing saboed myself into leading the cheer later on that night. At least it was better than the original.


Held a group discussion on which 'spells' to buy with our accumalated points for the final challenge. The fastfoward drained our points out a lot.


This night I chose to move below the bunks with my sleeping bag. I slept SOOOOOOOOO much more soundly. Had another 'flirting' round with my match about sleeping together, but eventually I was sleeping with my head near his foot. Three of us in a line.


Final day consisted of Final challenge. Long story short, funfunfunfunfun, done, and the Greeks won!!! I think the fact that all six waves of the section repeatedly won the first challenge helped greatly.


Meeting my group again for dinner tomorrow!! The battle continues...



By the way, my poor match got kena two accidents from me... poor guy.... I'm sorry!!!


My hips are still bruised from the first challenge... argh.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

No day is a good day until there comes one that's worse.

Man, I haven't felt this lousy in a looooooooooonnnnggg time...


And I have my holiday curse to thank. Every time we go abroad for a holiday, I come down with something or something happens to disrupt my holiday. And this time, I was exceptionally cursed.


Cambodia:

1) Obtained dehydration and heatstroke during temple climbing.

2)Obtained multiple swelling lymph nodes that have collectively ended up pressing on my salivery glands and are threatening to strangle me (well, they won't, but still), no thanks to the three abcesses in the le pit la arm.

3)Obtained recurring high fevers within the last three days of my trip, which roasted my already sunburnt face, and culminated in a barfing after the plane took off for the lousy flight home. It also rendered my stomach weak though hungry, and I still have a slight temperature, clogged chest and woozy head.

4) My period came in full force on the very day my mother promised to let me have the sea salt scrub.


The Bayon temple was good though. 54 towers and 216 faces of buddha. I dare anyone to take an illegal piss there. There are 432 eyes facing every direction watching. It can be very disturbing.

Angkor Wat really nothing special except for the central tower (it's BEAUTIFUL up there) and the sheer size of the complex.

I really wish I could explain the Le Beng La Bayon, but I shan't. Just know that 'Beng' here refers to something closer to home...


I'd love to say more, but I'm thirsty, and my well-meaning nodes are still strangling me.